You Caught Me Monologuing<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/p>\n I have asked the birds what this is all about, and Henwyn, at least, has been helpful. She agreed to come down out of the attic for a chat. And now she is telling me about the flock\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s journey to this house from their world in search of the Margravine. Though they speak to each other when I am near, I get the idea that the birds don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t always use words when they communicate to each other, but something about me or being in this world forces them into new ways of thinking. Henwyn often seems confused or frustrated when trying to tell me something, but then her eyes suddenly clear and the words flow.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Apparently, the Margravine was like a queen, or God, or wizard, or all three. And, the birds are her followers? Priests? Floundering Dependents? Anyway, they\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re here to find the Margravine and take her back to their world so it stops falling apart. Henwyn thinks that taking the Margravine back will stop the Earth from falling apart too. From what the box said, and what I felt, I agree with her. But Henwyn also says that the bones in the box are the Margravine, and if that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s so, why did the box come to me? Why not just appear in the attic where the birds could pick her up and fly away home as quickly as possible?<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Somehow I think there is more to this than what Henwyn is telling me. And she\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s still telling me. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s like she\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s just now figured out how much fun it is to talk. I wonder if the birds really actually talked before they came here? Henwyn also flips her tail and ruffles her wings at me while she speaks, like I should understand what that means. Maybe one day Fireflight, or I guess it would have been Nevermore, the raven, cocked her head, flipped a wing, and voil\u00c3\u00a0! The whole flock decided to cross dimensions and invade my attic. Maybe that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s why Fireflight doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t talk to me. Maybe he has been talking and I just didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t get it.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u0153\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 seem pompous, but he just wants what\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s best for the flock, so don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t hold it against him, dear. Fireflight really is a good leader.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Henwyn continues her monologue. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153We really were relieved when Nevermore went back home. She was great at starting this journey, but you know how some people are. She just ran out of steam once we arrived. And now, we have the box, so we can finally move forward, right?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s really on a roll, and barely glances at me to see if I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll answer. I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Soon, we\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll have our Margravine home safe, and you can get back to your normal life. We\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll see what Fireflight says, but I think the flock will be out of your attic as quickly as tomorrow.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Again, I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t disagree with her. Instead I want to ask one of the questions the box wouldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t answer. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153What am I supposed to do?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Nothing, dear. I think the box had to appear to someone of this world because it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s been here so long that we of the flock wouldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t have recognized it.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She looks away when she says this, and I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t believe her.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n So, I ask another question, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Why did the Margravine come to Earth?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n She\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s flustered. Her feet move on the back of the kitchen chair she is standing on. Shoulders hunch, and then relax. She finds the words, and the will, to tell me. I take a bite of my cereal and wait for the story to begin.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u0153A long time ago, long before I or any of the flock was born, the Margravine left our world. The birds of that time were sad but not really surprised. They knew the Margravine wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t happy in her world. And they could still feel her, still hear her spirit, no matter where she went. So, they wished her strength on her journey and went back to their homes and lives not very changed for the loss. However, a few of the birds worried about why the Margravine left, and what would happen if she stayed away. They began to meet together to ask the Margravine why she left, and what she was doing now.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n I interrupt Henwyn, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153But if she had already left, how could they ask her these questions?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She blinks her eyes at me and it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s obvious she\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s having trouble wrapping her head around this revelation of my ignorance. Another bite of soggy cereal, and she continues the story.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know how it is on this world, but in my home, all the birds understand all the other birds. It is hard to explain, but we are connected by the Margravine and the Duke and the Fool. So, of course we can speak to them at any time, in any place. Still, as the years have gone by, we have become somewhat rusty at communicating with the Margravine. In fact, that became one of the purposes of the Esteemed Flock; we work to keep ourselves in practice. Many of us are still not very good at it. And these days, no one outside of the flock even tries. But let\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s get back to what I was saying.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Those few who worried discovered that the Margravine was looking for someone. She left our world because she was lonely. They kept in touch with her, even as the people of our world grew further and further from not only the Margravine, but all three of our Founders. Generations came and went. The few passed on their knowledge and passion to younger birds, and they continued to follow the Margravine\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s travels vicariously. She went from our world out into the spaces. There, she met no one but saw many beautiful sights. The few who spoke to her wondered at the things she showed them. They were fascinated and constantly asked the Margravine about the spaces and how they worked and why they were. As always, the Margravine was very patient with us, her children, and perhaps even discovered things she herself wouldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t have looked into without our questions. That was a fantastic time in our world\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s history. These few shared the words of the Margravine with others who were too busy to speak to her themselves, and many of the birds turned what was discovered into useful tools and entertainments that benefited our world to no end.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u0153But, soon, the Margravine exhausted the realms of the spaces, and because she found no one to be her consort, she left. Again, the world was sad, but we adjusted. The inventions the Margravine left behind her sustained us quite happily. Again, few even noticed that it was harder to communicate with the Margravine now that she was farther away. I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t think anyone noticed that it became harder to communicate with each other too. It was some time later, when we looked back at how the birds were before, that we realized how far we have fallen. As you can imagine, over much time, the group of a few grew in numbers and complexity. Eventually, the world stopped caring at all, and the few wrapped themselves in melancholy and perseverance, becoming what we call the Esteemed Flock. Now, we are a way of life and a self-sustaining whole that can not only listen to the Margravine, but also act on her behalf.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u0153When she left the spaces, some of the few couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t contact her at all, and others found it very difficult. They had to reduce distractions and spend a lot of time just thinking about what the Margravine had said and done in the past in order to keep her connection fresh. Of the cohort that sits in your attic, Fireflight has perhaps the strongest connection to the Margravine. However, all of the magistrates, and a good percentage of the Flock, keep their thoughts attuned.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u0153What are magistrates?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d I interrupt again. My cereal is finished, and I get up to put on some coffee.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Henwyn chuckles, a funny clacking of her beak, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I, my dear, am the Empirical Magistrate of Care and Forward Thinking. It sounds much more cumbersome here than it did back home. I suppose you could call me a manager, or a mother, or perhaps a teacher. The Mohawk is His Highness, the Magistrate of Confluence and Resolution. And Sybil is obviously the Executive Magistrate of Admin-\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Suddenly, The Mohawk is flopping on the table in front of Henwyn quite furiously. He\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not using many words but I gather that he doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t think Henwyn should be talking to me.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n \u00e2\u20ac\u0153What are you doing!?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d He finally spits out, with a tail wiggle I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m glad is directed at Henwyn and not me. Henwyn squints down at him from her chair back, and doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t answer. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153The human! Why are you telling the human all these, these, these private details of our lives?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d he stutters. I have decided to pour the coffee and ignore The Mohawk, since he wants to act like I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m not here.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n This coffee is good. I wonder if my mother would drink some. She hasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t eaten today but she says sometimes the smell of coffee perks up her appetite. I put a granola bar on the saucer with another cup and walk silently past the ruffled Mohawk. He doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t stop yelling in Henwyn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s unperturbed face. I wonder if she\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s tuned him out too.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Louise Warren<\/p>\n <\/p>\n