{"id":5504,"date":"2016-01-01T05:08:18","date_gmt":"2015-12-31T20:08:18","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/?p=5504"},"modified":"2016-01-01T00:48:53","modified_gmt":"2015-12-31T15:48:53","slug":"lets-have-a-hot-bath-together-go-on-itll-be-fun","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/2016\/01\/lets-have-a-hot-bath-together-go-on-itll-be-fun\/","title":{"rendered":"“Let\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s have a hot bath together, go on, it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll be fun!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/b>"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u00c2\u00a0Onsen: a short history.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00c2\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00e6\u0161\u2021\u00e3\u0081\u00a4\u00e3\u0081\u00b6\u00e3\u0081\u2014\u00ef\u00bc\u02c6\u00e3\u0081\u00b2\u00e3\u0081\u00be\u00e3\u0081\u00a4\u00e3\u0081\u00b6\u00e3\u0081\u2014\u00ef\u00bc\u2030is a Japanese word whose meaning, as a JET, is probably extremely familiar to you by now. It literally translates to \u00e2\u20ac\u0153crushed time,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d and is the Japanese equivalent of our \u00e2\u20ac\u0153killing time.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d In my case, killing time at work usually involves drinking copious amounts of coffee that comes in wee little bags that clip onto the side of your cup: one to two bags down and you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re well lubricated, sashaying down the aisles of the office exchanging small talk with co-workers with the grace of a world champion ping pong player, pinging conversational ping pong balls down the social ping pong ball table with precision aplomb. Three to four and you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re hunched double down the back of the photocopier, legs akimbo, huge egg-like eyes peering out from behind the paper tray<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Tonsil Tennis<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

There are other ways, of course, to make use of the not insignificant amount of downtime that is part and parcel of the JET experience: brush up your Japanese skills by taking an online course, get up and brush the area around your desk, (if you can collect enough compacted dust and lint, you can make a rudimentary stress ball\u00e2\u20ac\u201c makes a simple yet effective Christmas stocking filler), brush the hair of the colleague sitting beside you when he\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s having his bi-hourly nap (it looks great on you Mr. Yamada, trust me<\/em>), take an hour of \u00e2\u20ac\u0153nenkyuu\u00e2\u20ac\u009d and go out to the shop and buy a few brushes (leave one inside every lunchbox you can find next to the sink\u00e2\u20ac\u201c trust me your coworkers will be in stitches), pop out to the gym and play ping pong with a brush instead of a bat and a bat instead of a ball (every time you score a point, shout out \u00e2\u20ac\u0153brush\u00e2\u20ac\u009d)\u00e2\u20ac\u201c trust me the kids will love it, and so on.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Cometh the man, cometh the hour<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00c2\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

But what about Onsen you say? Two paragraphs in and nary a peep about Japan\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s secret past time, and all this stuff about brushes too! Honestly, I just don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know where to begin. Onsen (pronounced \u00e2\u20ac\u0153awn-sayin\u00e2\u20ac\u009d if you are fond of wearing tight stonewash denim, and even if you aren\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t, you probably should) are part and parcel of Japan\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s leisure industry. They aren\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t really somewhere you can go when you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re supposed to be sat at your desk crushing time by compacting balls of hair, dead skin and rotten food into seasonal presents to send home to your family but hey, in a world where yes means no and \u00e2\u20ac\u0153you scratch my back, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll scratch yours\u00e2\u20ac\u009d are de rigeur,<\/em> anything\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s possible.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

A Muppet Christmas Carol<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00c2\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

Onsen are one of the cornerstones of Shinto Buddhism in the sense that a healthy, clean body equates to a mind and spirit of similar disposition. Most Onsen that you will encounter are not Onsen at all, but in fact Sento, Onsen requiring mineral infused water to be present in at least one bath, and no cheating like adding minerals to regular bath water either. The ritual for bathing is precise\u00e2\u20ac\u201c when you walk in, you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll see a plastic stool on the floor with a showerhead above it, and if you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re lucky, some large bottles of industrial strength body sopu and shanpu that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll take five years off you (as well as about 40 percent of your epidermis). To avoid absolute catastrophe, follow the following rules like a malnourished frostbitten man on a mountain following a yak along a treacherous ledge\u00e2\u20ac\u201c one false move and you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll be an early Christmas dinner for the societal vultures circling above you.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Things to do <\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Wash the wee plastic stool thingy before you sit on it with the shower head.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

     <\/p>\n

      \n
    1. Wash your hair and then your body once, with the complimentary exfoliants as a pre-wash cleanser, then follow with a secondary, vigorous hair and body wash. Finally, follow with an in-depth deep pore pre-bathing penetrating wash. By now, your body will be stripped of all dirt, sweat, natural oils, vitamins and minerals and you will resemble a freshly embalmed Egyptian princess (yes that applies to you too boys).<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

       <\/p>\n

        \n
      1. Fold the B4 paper sized wafer thin towel that you were given at the reception desk (oh you didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t forget to get one, did you?) into a small square pie shape. Balance it on the top of your head. DO NOT allow it to fall in the water.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

         <\/p>\n

          \n
        1. Gently lower your red raw body into the 40c plus water and enjoy.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

          \u00c2\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

          Things don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t do <\/strong><\/p>\n

          \u00c2\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

            \n
          1. Getting the small pie shaped towel wet<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

             <\/p>\n

              \n
            1. Non-stamping of nenykuu forms with personal hanko resulting in unauthorized nenkyuu or stamping of personal hanko on nenkyuu form in incorrect position resulting in unauthorized nenkyuu.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

               <\/p>\n

                \n
              1. Heavy petting<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

                 <\/p>\n

                Terminator Genysis<\/strong><\/p>\n

                \u00c2\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

                There\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a great Onsen I go to near Komabayashi subway (Kaigan line\u00e2\u20ac\u201c you know, the blue one). Is it really an Onsen? I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m not sure, there\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s brown water in some of the baths, but the cause of that is anyone\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s guess. Sometime last year, there was a large bulbous squash on display in the foyer. Probably not there now, mind.<\/p>\n

                 <\/p>\n

                 <\/p>\n

                END<\/p>\n

                 <\/p>\n

                Scott Patterson<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

                \u00c2\u00a0Onsen: a short history. \u00c2\u00a0 \u00e6\u0161\u2021\u00e3\u0081\u00a4\u00e3\u0081\u00b6\u00e3\u0081\u2014\u00ef\u00bc\u02c6\u00e3\u0081\u00b2\u00e3\u0081\u00be\u00e3\u0081\u00a4\u00e3\u0081\u00b6\u00e3\u0081\u2014\u00ef\u00bc\u2030is a Japanese word whose meaning, as a JET, is probably extremely familiar to you by now. It literally translates to \u00e2\u20ac\u0153crushed time,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d and is the Japanese equivalent of our \u00e2\u20ac\u0153killing time.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d In my case, killing time at work usually involves drinking copious amounts of coffee that comes in wee…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":105,"featured_media":5499,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false},"categories":[439,417],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/AlanLightviaWikimediaCommons.jpg","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5504"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/105"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5504"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5504\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/5499"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5504"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5504"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5504"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}