<\/p>\n
I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m not a student, that much is certain; but I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m also not really a teacher. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m like Gollum\u00e2\u20ac\u201c technically not part of either side, useful to both if controlled correctly, but too unpleasant to keep on long-term and liable to dance weirdly when he gets his way.<\/p>\n
The No-Man\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s-Land nature of my job became startlingly apparent at the beginning of this term for whatever reason. Every day for a week, there was an event happening in which I was expected to participate but about which I was given no prior indication.<\/p>\n
On the first day, there was an assembly where I was expected to come up and be showcased (with the second-year teachers, for reasons that mere mortals such as us are not privy to). No one told me this\u00e2\u20ac\u201c not my JTE, not my Kyoto-Sensei who was running the assembly, not any one of the teachers who walked past me on their way to the stage because naturally I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d chosen a spot to stand which created a huge bottleneck. I only realised what was happening and had to run up, pushing numerous other teachers out of the way and generally making a fool of myself, after Kyoto-Sensei said my name and turned to the stage expectantly.<\/p>\n
Second day, there was another, entirely different assembly. I got no prior warning about this at all and only caught wind that something was up when I looked around and found the staff room was deserted. However, on the bright side, this did give me a legitimate reason to mutter to myself \u00e2\u20ac\u0153It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s quiet\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6too <\/em>quiet.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n Third day, there were not one but two assemblies (I think Honcho-Sensei has a problem)\u00e2\u20ac\u201c this time they decided to split the difference and personally escort me to one but completely neglect to mention the other like it was a classified operation to try and kill Hitler or make Cr\u00c3\u00a8me eggs a year round treat.<\/p>\n This culminated in Unexpected School Photo Day: I turned up to school to find everyone in suits while I look like a Scarecrow with its pole pulled out. One of my JTEs glanced up at me as I walked in, gasped, and whispered, confused, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Kelly-Sensei, didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t you know\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n No, I didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know. I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t speak Japanese and I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve never worked at a Japanese school\u00e2\u20ac\u201c am I meant to use my spidey sense to magically divine when and where these events that I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve never heard of before are taking place?<\/p>\n This is especially aggravating as at the end of the school day I ask the English teachers if there\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s anything I need to prepare and they almost always say \u00e2\u20ac\u0153no.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d This would be a perfect opportunity for them to give me a quick heads-up about something important the next day but apparently that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not to be. Of course, I could just start asking very explicitly \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Is there anything happening tomorrow that it would be super-embarrassing for me to miss out on or not be properly dressed for?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d and then, if they forget to forewarn me of anything, I could sue them for criminal negligence, but I would hope that such brutish precision isn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t necessary among colleagues.<\/p>\n The thing I find odd about this is that I somewhat suspect that they suffer more from this than I do. So far, my ignorance has lead me to miss a few boring assemblies and pose in a sub-par photo. So what? Those assemblies weren\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t for my benefit and I will never see that photo. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m certainly not going to hang it up in my place of work to look at every day from now on. I can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t help but feel that they would benefit more if the teachers fully embraced me as one of their own, rather than stringing me on with the occasional gift of a fish head as I lead them to Mount Doom.<\/p>\n But I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know, maybe I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m just being precious.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Rory Kelly<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m not a student, that much is certain; but I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m also not really a teacher. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m like Gollum\u00e2\u20ac\u201c technically not part of either side, useful to both if controlled correctly, but too unpleasant to keep on long-term and liable to dance weirdly when he gets his way. The No-Man\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s-Land nature of my job became…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":113,"featured_media":5689,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false},"categories":[443,417,22],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/RKellyCaption-Me-when-someone-says-my-name-in-the-staffroom.jpg","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5700"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/113"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5700"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5700\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/5689"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5700"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5700"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hyogoajet.net\/hyogotimes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5700"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}